Terrible Timing

They say that timing is everything. That’s unfortunate, as my husband and I seem to have terrible timing!

As we both approach 40 and our peers are starting to feel pretty comfortable where they’re at and get on with doing kitchen renovations and extending their houses, we’re about to do the opposite and things might get pretty uncomfortable for a while in this mad house as we furiously get on with living smaller.

Why? Well, it’s time to let go of what we’ve done for the last twenty years and as of a few weeks ago, not only am I no longer ‘A teacher’. He isn’t ‘A geophysicist’ anymore either, meaning we have no reliable income at all.

Unfortunately, I am a person who likes nice things. I wouldn’t mind being Kim Kardashian. Well, I wouldn’t mind her money. But I’d take a dishwasher, a stick vac and new pair of trainers and at the moment even they’re out of reach.

I’ve been a stay at home mum for the last couple of years and one income has felt tough. In reality, it’s not been. I have other shoes, I can wash my own dishes and the vac I have, while cumbersome, does the job well enough for a two bed home with no carpet. As we head into just ‘using the savings’ territory though, it’s about to actually get tough. Not only will my Dyson dreams have to be put aside, what we eat, how I manage to buy Christmas gifts and whether my son can still do swimming lessons have all become real considerations.

I realize that this still isn’t close to what poverty looks like. That I still have a lifestyle that most of the world’s population would be envious of because I get to eat every day, I live in a safe home, and a country in which if my children are taken ill they’ll be cared for. But for me, for us, it’s going to be a huge change. One I’m not sure how prepared we are for.

It’s not like it’s taken us by surprise. My husband hasn’t been made redundant or taken ill. We’ve chosen this. He’s taken the leap to go back to university to retrain as a doctor. Something which I admire for it’s bravery and it’s integrity. Something which directly fits with my philosophy that you just get one shot at life, so live it how you want to. But something which, as we embark on it in reality, is starting to scare the shit out of me.

On the one hand, I’m looking forward to the challenge of actually budgeting properly and only buying what we need. Of ensuring I don’t fall into the trap of spoiling my children and of showing them the value of money and that what actually is important in life isn’t a new train every time we go past the toy aisle at Woollies.

On the other, I’d like that stick vac.

It’s been a long time and a lot of work to get to the point where if I want to stop on the way past a coffee shop and buy a $5 flat white, I can do. If I forget my lunch or am out longer than expected, I can pick up a sandwich from the bakery. And I like it.

I’m not a student anymore and it’s not the norm to ask for just hot water when I meet someone for a drink and dunk my own dusty teabag from the depths of my duffle coat. Not least because I no longer live in Manchester, but Brisbane, so I don’t have a coat.

But it’s about to be again.

Only this time, I’m not simply surrounded by others on a pretty tight budget too. And it’s not just myself that will be subjected to a diet of various items on toast all week and the cheap sugary yogurts. Sorry kids.

This time, as well as friends and family who can order the muffin as well as the drink without checking their change situation, I’m also surrounded by an Insta generation of people who spend $600 on a belt and as much on their toddler’s shoes as their own.

Now, while coming from working class Northern roots, I like to think I do know the real values in life, and I know that it’s not all about money. However, I still wanted to have some by my late 30s, dammit.

Luckily, that’s not ALL I want!

I want to be a supportive wife. I want to be a good mother. A nice person with her head screwed on who can cope with whatever the world throws at her and make do, a la our grandmother’s generation. And, I want to be a success in my own right at something I enjoy.

So, as Sean heads back to university, I’m about to launch a children’s swimwear business. I’ve also got a 6 month old baby. Which goes back to my point about our timing being terrible.

But maybe I’m framing it wrongly. Maybe it’s the best timing ever. My children are young enough not to know what they don’t have, and they will have more than enough. They won’t know that their gum boots are not Hunter but Home Bargains. And, if I can claw my way back out of Insta envy and stop focusing on Facebook but family, maybe I can teach them, and remind myself, it really, truly, doesn’t matter anyway. So here’s to the challenge of focusing on what does.

#Change #Business #Study #Lifestyle #Balance #Money